For those who, like me, thrive on that outlet, it is a new kind of Hell to have zero idea what to do. There is no algorithm for creating a next step, no formula for coming up with something else to make happen. This doesn’t just happen in writing, it can happen in art, in life, at the office, anywhere that requires some kind of procurement of an idea. It can cause procrastination, questioning of life choices/oneself, and many internal crises. More than just feeling a block on one aspect of my life, I feel a sense of being completely blocked off from the way I see the world best and the way that I communicate with myself. As you can imagine, that feeling sucks.

I wish that I could refer to a definitive list of ways to overcome these feelings, but I don’t have that magical list. I have no idea how to get over that block. I’m slowly figuring it out, but the big fear is that it will never be an issue that is resolved. I’m an art major and will probably always continue writing. If it is not an issue that goes away, my career will probably suffer.

Perhaps it’s an inspiration flaw. When around fellow artists or writers, the phrase “drawing inspiration” constantly comes up, and maybe the real problem is that I have no idea how to do that. I am writing this on a deck on a house in the country with a beautiful view, and I am still struggling to come up with the words to put in this article. I constantly listen to podcasts that make me see/think about things differently, and I still can’t translate that into an idea. I have an amazing group of friends that will always talk about ideas and theories and anything else. Yet, somehow, I am still struggling. I know that there are others as confused as I am when somebody says they spent some time looking at the sunset and got a brilliant idea for a piece. How come somebody else can so easily read a quote from their favorite author and suddenly be set to go again?

Then comes the real question in this long string of “what ifs” that come from being blocked. Am I really an artist if I don’t know how to draw inspiration? Am I really a writer if I’m struggling to write about, of all things, my greatest passion? Am I kidding myself even trying, or is this something that everybody goes through constantly?

But of course, I’m not kidding myself. Every artist has their block, which is why it can be so damn hard sometimes. We create, and our well-being is based on the quality of our own work and how other people perceive it. Qualifying myself as an artist or a writer only depends on how I value my own work and therefore how I handle this writer’s block. So far I’m handling it by brainstorming more ideas for articles, and coming up with ideas for a potential new column. I’m trying to write more when I have the chance about whatever I can. I’m trying to come up with things that I could draw when I have the chance to sit down and draw them. I’m thinking of projects I could try for the intermedia class that I am taking in the fall. So far it’s a lot of thinking about things and experimenting, which is something that everybody has to do. It connects me to myself more than being blocked off could even disconnect me from myself. It is a comforting thought.

So, step one for getting over this writer’s block is to do what seems natural: write a column about it and post it on the internet. I’ve been working on this for weeks, and now I’m done with it. Maybe this will make it easier to sit down and write about Frida Kahlo, or comic book/graphic novel art, or synesthesia, or the capitalistic side of the art industry, or aesthetic, or the concept of an album, or whatever else I want to write about. I am excited to see what I come up with after this block is gone, and I hope that it is all created soon.

[SHAMELESS PLUGS: here are my Instagram and Twitter if you would like to keep updated on what I’m doing next]

The Looking Glass is a bimonthly column that aims to analyze and share different aspects and forms of art. It will focus on different artists, writing, music/musicians, exhibitions, etc. Along with this, the column will ask questions and point out interesting controversies. Art is a constantly flowing and vast part of our society and culture that we are all submerged in daily, and discussion about the medium is a critical part of a full understanding and open mind.

The post The Looking Glass: Blocked Off appeared first on KRUI Radio.

Disclaimer: Article contains content that may be offensive or unsuitable for minors. 

This week’s frustrations come to you in exhaustion, confusion, disbelief, and as always, disappointment (accurately displayed by Chris Tucker).

I had high hopes for the new semester. I felt reinvigorated with a motivation to excel, and prayed for good professors in each of my classes. So far, I have faced many similar issues I explained in previous pieces about ignorant people and mildly racist professors. Strap in, everyone.

I’m taking a class about literature written by women all over the world, and I expected my peers and teacher to have base knowledge about respecting nonwhite people. At the very least, you’d think the people taking this class would know what NOT to say. Once again, I clearly overestimated the capacity that white people have to NOT be racist.

Let’s start with my professor.

She asked us to watch a documentary called “Drowned Out” about lower class people displaced by a dam in India, like tribal people and the caste of Dalit people. She posted a short history of India to provide some background information on the story. She pointed at me and said, “Tanvi can correct us if we make any mistakes.”

Oh of course! She MUST be referring to that gene in my DNA which codes for COMPLETE knowledge of the ENTIRE history of India! Every Indian is born with this ability, enabling them to serve as walking encyclopedias for whites.

I grew up in suburban Iowa. I’ve had relatively the same education as all the other people in that class. If white kids don’t know about Indian history, neither do I. That’s a failure from the American education system, not Indian American people.

I realize my professor didn’t intend to be racist (see definition of microaggression), but truthfully she made me feel like I had failed. Sadly, I don’t know that much about the history of my country, and it doesn’t help when she arbitrarily expects me, out of all of my classmates, to have this plethora of knowledge that I lack.

Okay, let’s move on to my peers. 

After watching the documentary, my class discussed various aspects of the movie like stylistic choices, and intended audience. One girl was grateful for the subtitles when people spoke Hindi and Gujarati, but she wished the movie included subtitles when Indian people spoke English because “they don’t speak the same English I do.”

First of all, she’s so fucking self-absorbed to assume that all media is created for HER, WHITE AMERICAN consumption. All spaces belong to her, and all forms of art should be marketed and directed towards people like her.

Second of all, IT’S A MOVIE. Rewind that shit. Listen to it again. I promise, it’s not that hard. Maybe you’re just not used to listening to accents. That’s fine! BUT YOU HAVE TO TRY.

Thirdly, “the English I speak?” Are you kidding me? British people colonized India, said a bunch of horrible shit about its people, imposed upon them western culture, exploited the country’s resources and left people in destitute conditions. White people FORCED Indians into experiencing and appreciating Western culture. Don’t try to separate yourself from the horrors your ancestors committed in India through accents and dialectical discrepancies. Also, that’s just an ignorant, condescending comment in general.

The most baffling comment came from another white girl who theorized the purpose of making a documentary about people living in poverty in India. She thought the British-made documentary was created in order to “humanize” them.

Actually, Indian people of all classes were human before white minds acknowledged their issues, white hands created this movie, and white eyes saw this movie. 

Her comment illustrates this neo-colonialist perspective that white people must validate nonwhite people; otherwise, they’re not real. They’re literally not-human.

These two girls probably didn’t intend to degrade Indian people like that, but that’s the scary part. People say denigrating things like this every day and have no idea the violence they inflict on the targeted group.

If you don’t believe this happens often, consider the fact that I write 500+ words every month on my recent frustrations. This shit is real.

But even if white readers don’t believe me, I don’t need them to validate my struggles. I don’t need affirmation from them in order to concretize my emotions or confirm that they’re real. However, white people must acknowledge how their words and actions affect the people around them. You have to recognize the consequences of your discourse.

Once you understand that, I don’t know HOW you’ll justify to yourself that saying racist things is okay.

Decolonize your mind by respecting nonwhite people. I can’t believe I even have to say that, but this column is evidence that I do.

The idea of “decolonizing our minds” comes from writings of the author, feminist and social activist bell hooks. She encourages us to critically examine every thought and action, free ourselves from the coercive ideologies, and overcome the impacts of structural oppression. This bimonthly column will analyze spaces and times where and when we can pause and make strides in this arduous process, and also highlight figures who are helping us to decolonize ourselves.

The post Decolonize Your Mind: Microaggression-mania! appeared first on KRUI Radio.