My assignment of watching a movie each day this year has taken a serious blow. Professional football season has begun. I enjoy just about every major sport including college football, but when the NFL season starts, it seems that all I have time to do is either watch football, analyze football teams, or watch talking heads overanalyze football teams. Still, this movie thing has got to get done.

I could have just watched a bunch of football movies, but any of the ones worth watching are about high school or college ball. God knows I am not wasting my time writing about Draft Day. So instead I decided to look at my list of movies and see which ones resemble which teams in today’s NFL landscape. I am a bit of an asshole when it comes to football, so if I go hard on your team, sorry. Just keep in mind I’m a Detroit Lions fan.

The Dallas Cowboys are the entire modern DC Comics film franchise. America’s Team. Not a great nickname considering most people you know probably find the Cowboys and their fans to be insufferable. Year after year, the Cowboys come out of training camp as one of the most hyped teams in the league. Even when their quarterback breaks his back in the preseason and they have quite literally no defense, they are still supposed to win it all.

Just like Man of Steel, Batman Vs. Superman, and now Suicide Squad, it seems impossible for the Cowboys to live up to the hype. These movies (and the Boys) always come primed and ready to become financial successes, but no one really made sure to bother that they would be good or even entertaining. Yes, I am very excited for 2017’s Wonder Woman, and yes I still think the Cowboys will suck next year.

The Baltimore Ravens are director Ridley Scott. Both have celebrated and storied pasts. Both won their respective industries’ highest honor in early 2001 when the Ravens won the Super Bowl and Scott’s Gladiator won the Oscar for best picture. Most important of all, no one has any idea what to expect of their next effort. Scott’s last movie, The Martian, won awards, made tons of money, and was hailed as an unmitigated success. He is also responsible for instants classics such as Blade Runner and Alien. Recent flops however, like Prometheus and Exodus, have shaken viewers’ confidence much like the Ravens’ last season. Much like Scott’s recent films, the Ravens could go 6-10 with a sluggish season or 10-6 with a playoff berth or better.

Finally, my Detroit Lions are the film Requiem for a Dream. Year after year I find myself coming back to football just as excited as the year before, even though my favorite team is historically one of the worst in the NFL. They were the only team to post a winless 0-16 season after all. Much like the lives of four people who are tragically ruined by drugs in Requiem for a Dream, my world seems to come apart each fall. I keep coming back to my Honolulu Blue-clad team with high expectations that are set simply to be crushed almost instantly. The fact that I can even make a comparison between being a Lions’ fan and a drug addict shows just how bad my team is. At least I will have more time to watch movies when they start the season 1-7 and the sweet high of football season wears off.

For those interested to take a look back into some of the greatest football matches, then you should take a look at the history of St James’ Park here.

Watch and Talk is a column that discusses movies. They are not always reviewed, but are simply talked about. Watch and Talk looks at the various cultural aspects and impacts of films.

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 This Is All Yours is the sophomore studio album from English alternative rock band alt-j. It is the follow up to their 2012 release Awesome Waves, which put the band on the map as one of the UK’s top indie artists.Many critics and journalists have labeled them as the “next Radiohead”, with their subtle blend electronic, post-rock, and alternative elements.

The album begins with “Intro“, a slowly-building song that reaches its epic peak with thunderous bass and harmonizing vocals that would sound at home in a monastery or cathedral.

Strangely, the album takes a soft turn after the introduction, with the songs “Arrival in Nara” and “Nara”. Both of the slow moving songs are some of the most guitar-centered tracks on the album, featuring spacy and reverb filled riffs. The low end sounds of the guitars and bass are perfectly contrasted by the light and airy vocal deliveries.

Things begin to pick up with “Every Other Freckle“, a song about sexual frustration bordering on obsession. The gritty and distorted bass riffs, along with the rough and jagged acoustic guitar parts, give the song an almost country-rock vibe, and make it one of the stand out tracks of the record.

This more intense energy is followed up by “Left Hand Free“, a blusy jam with lyrics mentioning guns and a stand-off. For me, these two tracks, which are the heaviest and most up-tempo songs, are the shining moments of the album.

“Garden of England”, an instrumental track of nature sounds and light-hearted flute playing, serves as a sort of interlude of the album. It is perfectly juxtaposed with “Choice Kingdom”, a slow moving and subdued song that explores the topic of imperialism in Britain.

From here, things begin to take a turn for the more bizarre, and in my opinion, the worse. “Hunger of the Pine” is almost completely devoid of the interesting guitar work seen earlier in the record, and features a hook from Miley Cyrus’ “4×4”.

The ballad “Warm Foothills” features singers trading words and phrases in the middle of lines, a gimmick that comes across as jarring instead of unique or particularly creative.

“The Gospel of St. John” (a song about the infamous and extremely graphic chest bursting scene in the Ridley Scott film Alien), briefly revs up the energy, but the album again slumps into slow-plodding and generally uninteresting ballads.

“Pusher” is stripped down acoustic ballad, which seems awkward and out of place compared to the electronic rock feel of the rest of the record. “Bloodflow pt. II” features violent and sexual imagery, but beyond the lyrics there was not much to keep me interested. “Leaving Nara” closes out the album, and returns to the vibe felt in some of the earlier songs.

Overall, the album felt disjointed and unsure of itself at times. The lyrics were insightful at their best, but occasionally came off as strange, pretentious, and at their worst, a little silly. The electronic rock and guitar-centered sound of the first half of the album gets completely lost later on, and is replaced by more synthesized and unnatural sounds. The later songs seem disconnected and unrelated to the feeling and atmosphere of the record. While alt-J really hit their stride in the middle of This Is All Yours, the record as a whole just can’t stand up to the same standard.

Standout Tracks: “Left Hand Free”, “Every Other Freckle”, and “The Gospel of St. John”

This Is All Yours is available for streaming at Spotify and is available for download on iTunes

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